OCT 31, 2024 | ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT | By Michelle Brubaker
An excerpt from a longer piece
[Play “Tears from Your Eyes” by Morin Khuur Ensemble of Mongolia]
As the sun dipped behind the hills, which appeared as a dark silhouette against fading light, the sky unfolded into a breathtaking canvas of vibrant colors. It was a rich mosaic of golden yellow blending seamlessly into a deep amber which then transitioned to a dramatic painting with shades of dark blue and light blue. The magnificent clouds that floated above me bathed in the warm golden light and others in cool blue hues, which added texture and depth.
The reflection of the sun’s departure on the river elevated the moment, creating a mosaic of colors that gradually shifted from violet to orange and from orange to dark blue. The river subtly mirrored the sky, with the gentle movements causing the colors to blend easily.
I was in awe, attempting to capture this fleeting moment with my camera. It was only then that I fully appreciated the beauty of the sunset and the quiet joy of being present. This serene moment mirrored the soft and comforting feeling that I experienced while observing my mother’s smile, which had become a cherished memory.
Her smile, warm and genuine, seemed to embody the resilience and strength that had shaped her life. Beneath it lay the story of a challenging upbringing and tireless effort to provide for her family. In the capital, she managed the household, often working long hours during a time when Mongolia was transitioning from socialism to a free market economy, one of the most difficult periods for the country’s history.
Some of her notable achievements include establishing the first offices of the UN’s Food and Agricultural Organization (FAO) in Ulaanbaatar. In her role, she managed funding that eventually supported projects aimed at improving conditions for rural communities, including initiatives in her hometown of Murun. Her dedication extended beyond her family members, reflecting her deep commitment to her community. Her mindset was always centered around making a difference. She believed that if help was needed, it was her duty to extend a hand and offer support.
Her career was marked by a relentless pursuit of opportunities, driven by courage and determination that were truly remarkable. Despite the low wages and economic hardships that Mongolia faced, she continued to support her family and help others in need. Her bravery and dedication were apparent in every aspect of her life. The qualities woven into the fabric of her daily existence were what I carried with me as a source of admiration and inspiration.
~
After finally arriving at Lake Khuvsgul and approaching the resort camp owned by my aunt, Оюунтуяа эгч, I was struck by its beauty. The camp faced the serene lake, enclosed by forested hills. The gers were scattered throughout the camp, mostly arranged in groups, while some of the landscape was sprinkled with cozy small cabins. It was a sight to appreciate because this was one of my favorite places, although we could only stay for two nights.
The cool air was refreshing, especially as the land was lightly covered in fog and a drizzle of rain. The scent of the damp earth beneath me was soothing and inviting.
Near the lake stood a large dining hall, with wooden tables and chairs inside that were arranged to accommodate both large and small groups. A central stove was lit up, though I still felt the chill in the air.
My mother sat across me, wearing my grandmother’s дээл (deel), a Mongolian traditional dress, as we waited for the hot milk tea and ‘цуйван’ (tsuivan), a popular Mongolian stir fried noodle dish favored by many tourists. While we waited, she insisted that I take her photo. I captured the moment with my camera, yet again, my gaze fell upon her smiling face, a constant snapshot present in my memories.
My albums have always been filled with pictures of her that I have taken over the years. Each photo was a beautiful memory, even if she disagreed. To me, her smile has been a source of comfort for me through my hardest and most emotionally stressful times. It spoke of our family, our history. In every smile, I saw her strength, resilience, and the love that flowed through her, quietly whispering encouraging words.
Like the night sky,
You shine with endless light.
A beacon of kindness,
With a heart that is pure and bright.
You help others endlessly,
With compassion that never ends.
Similar to the moon’s glow,
Illuminating through life’s darkest periods.
You have a heart of gold,
A true, shining star.
Just like the moon’s eternal presence,
You are always by my side.
Your heart is extraordinary,
Being reflected in my eyes.
You are always yourself,
Ready to offer a hand.
[End]
~
[Play “White Stupa No. 2” by Morin Khuur Ensemble of Mongolia]
As I finished up the first section of Ruth Ozeki’s “The Face: A Time Code,” in which she wrote down her observations while looking at her reflection in the mirror for a full three hours, I find myself reflecting particularly on how experiences and our relationship evolve and can shape one’s identity. I sat quietly, reading, reflecting, and listening to one of my favorite calming melodies. Occasionally, I glanced up, letting my eyes rest on the distant Pikes Peak. The combination of soothing music of the morin khuur and the natural landscape blended into a moment of quiet reflection. These elements began to dissolve into one another, coming alive in a harmonious way that enhanced my sensory experience.
The leaves resting on the branches of the tall, towering trees in front of me were full of life, gently swaying in the soft breeze as if being caressed. The sun bathed them in a warm, golden light, reflecting their joy and making the surrounding landscape bright and beautiful. It made me want to stay in this spot for a while, to relax and immerse myself in the natural beauty.
They linger in our lives, woven in history’s thread.
Yet often, we forget their silent, steady company.
They stand still, patiently, waiting for our gaze,
While they quietly fade in the background.
They lift others, letting them steal the light,
Those we see and touch, day in and day out.
Yet their unseen presence fills the boundless air,
Offering comfort, a quiet prayer.
Beyond the mountain’s many mounts
Lies a stretch of unknown, a path unexplored.
Each day we ponder what lies ahead,
But doubts and fears keep our hearts troubled.
So we drift in a sea of endless noise,
Missing the beauty, the quiet joys.
Their aliveness waits, hidden from our sight
As we journey on, lost in our endless flight.
In this quiet stillness, the sun dipped lower in the sky, behind the mountain, where the golden light softened into the night. With a final glance at the peak, I allowed myself to be fully present in the moment. I could still hear the mellow, soft strains of the morin khuur echoing through my mind. As I moved forward, my heart was full of gratitude and my mind at ease. I carried with me the beauty of the scenes that I had just witnessed and the memories that had become part of my identity.
[Can play the music for a bit more, before ending at 2:48]