DECEMBER 12, 2025 | OPINION | By Grant Loui
Colorado College doesn’t have a large or complex party culture. As I have seen and experienced firsthand, the ‘party culture’ here is very cliquey and hostile to those they don’t see as ‘normal.’
This is an entirely true story. On Halloween, I was waiting for some friends when a group of guys left the Sigma Chi fraternity house. As they passed me, a few people watched me wait. My friends didn’t show up, so I decided to go alone. Maybe it’s my fault for going to Craig’s alone, but I usually go to parties alone and meet people there. I went to Craig’s, but as soon as I arrived, I felt eyes on me. I noticed that some guys, specifically from Sig Chi, were watching me, laughing and whispering. Then they walked over and formed a semi-circle around me, trapping me against the fence. One of them started to talk to me. He began to give me ‘advice’—well, less advice and more loosely veiled insults. To spare you the ramblings of a drunk asshole, I will summarize his points, but trust me, this wasn’t advice: it was an attack. Essentially, he told me I need to stop chasing girls—which I wasn’t—because they wouldn’t want me. He said I need to lose weight, find meaning in my life and ultimately, I need to better myself. The other guys around me chimed in with agreement, boiling down to, “Stop being so weird and creepy.” Then, he had the audacity to get in my face and say, “Let’s all just have a good time,” before patting my shoulder and dapping me up. I left Craig’s immediately afterward.
This experience, I believe, perfectly captures the issues with CC party culture. The main problem is that there’s no widespread party scene; it’s just a few select groups of people who party and act as if anyone can join. There aren’t true campus-wide events; there are gatherings for cliques such as sports teams, Greek life members or friend groups known for partying. If you’re not in one of these cliques or don’t have a close friend in one, it’s tough to go out and party. And if someone in those cliques dislikes you or finds you odd, you don’t get to enjoy college parties. Instead, you get treated like a creep and a loser for trying to come to a party. There is a significant disconnect between how the CC party culture is described and how it actually is. People often say that the parties are open and no one is ever bullied, but this is simply not true. While CC is a small school, that does not lend itself to a more inclusive culture.
This school is so small that word travels fast and most people know, or at least know of, each other. I didn’t know who the man at Craig’s was, but I knew he was a friend of some people who lived in my hall my first year, including those who have gossiped about me and think I’m weird. That guy saw me earlier in the night as he was walking to Craig’s. He saw me alone, trying to call someone and then he saw me show up at the party by myself. I must have looked exactly like the way his friends described me: a weirdo with no friends.
If you’re wondering how I know what people say about me, it’s because I used to walk around the dorms and campus with headphones on, but my headphones wouldn’t play anything. People aren’t afraid to talk shit if they think you can’t hear them, even if you’re right next to them. The man thought he knew me and thought I’d be an easy target for his ‘advice.’ And he was right; I am an easy target. I don’t fit the mold of the CC partier. I don’t like to drink or smoke. I’m not attractive and I’m overweight. I’m not very strong and I’ve never had a partner.
People like to act shocked that I haven’t had a girlfriend and love to tell me all the ways I should change myself to finally be attractive. People have laughed at me for explaining that I find beer gross, or scoff when I tell them I can’t bench that much. Bouncers look at me critically, wondering why this guy is here and say, “This guy is going home alone.”
I’ve never really taken these seriously; I always chalked it up to the alcohol making them honest. Despite these comments, and despite the fact that I don’t like to drink or smoke, I loved going out last year. I don’t think I’ve ever made a bad impression on anyone and felt I matched people’s energy fairly well.
But the longer I’ve been at CC, the more hostile the parties have become and the more the comments have started to hurt. The friends I used to go out with stopped inviting me because, “We thought you wouldn’t wanna go,” even when I expressed interest. If I see a friend at a party, there’s a good chance they will ignore me or get pulled away by someone in the party scene who can tell I don’t fit the mold. At a bigger school, I wouldn’t be so noticeable; I would be one in a crowd of hundreds. But this school is so small that everyone knows everyone.
So, to the people in the party culture at CC, I guess I’m just the weird guy who arrives sober and alone. And at a school with such a small, cliquey party culture, it’s hard to change your image, especially when it’s been implemented by drunk kids who have already made up their minds about you. People spread their ideas about you until even your own friends pretend not to see you at a party because they don’t want to risk getting lumped in with you as an outsider. What they say about you even spreads beyond the party scene and affects your social life in general.
I don’t go to parties anymore. I know I’m not welcome; even when I hear people say that anyone is welcome, I know that not everyone really is. To them, I’m not a person. I’m a freak, I’m an invader, and therefore unwelcome. Unwelcome at parties, unwelcome at clubs or in friend groups and unwelcome at CC.